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Rains and the Family of Man

The rainy season in the Gambia normally starts in June. At its height in August and September the rainfall is extraordinary. This year June or rather the rainy season came early, arriving with a spectacular storm on Monday evening. Temperatures plummeted to the low thirties and each day since has been cloudy with light rain at night. Sleeping in the heat was always a problem. Sleeping when you have a thousand rain clouds drumming on your tin roof is nigh on impossible. Which is worse I am really not sure although it is good to have a change. The storm, however, was not significant because it kept all of us with tin roofs awake but that in one night the landscape changed. Flooding waters found every available route to create a rivers of water washing rubbish and mud into new locations and no doubt towards the river. Sandy roads suddenly became mud swamps and previously acceptable motorcycle routes across bad roads suddenly became impossible to trust. Footpaths are like glue with red mud and a hard crust across the top of what seems like wallpaper paste.
That said the lower temperatures have made it easier to walk around and once again explore the communities and meet people. On Thursday evening a chance encounter with four army lads and the head teacher of a local school developed into a conversation about extended families. You may know that Gambian men may have four wives and what we in the UK would class as step brothers are brothers. They talked of everyone being their brothers, I was their brother and because of that came social responsibility i.e. if somebody comes into your house and asks for food you are expected to feed them because they are your brother. They explained that the elder brother is always right even when they are wrong and when push comes to shove younger brothers have to back off and allow the elder brother to have his way. I have to reflect that if my younger brother had done that, well boy, would we have gotten into trouble.
The extended family means you can ask a family member for something because if they can they will give it, which apparently explains why three times this week I have been asked for my laptop.
Now of course these requests are quite irksome to some of us and my reply is normally why would I give to you? They reply, “Because I need it.” I have tried the “What do you need it for?” approach, You live in a hut without electricity and you cannot read but that means nothing so my reply, of course, has become “I need it to.” when they reply, “But you can get another one.” I try to be cool, to explain and to suggest that they could work and save as I had to but do they understand? No. Are they embarrassed? No.
I am still not sure how the extended family works, sure I understand the concept but it appears that when they explain it to me it means that I, as a toubab brother, should provide everyone with everything I have, for clearly I live in a country where laptops, ipods, mobile phones and cameras grow on trees.
As for four wives, hmmm, I love Lynn to bits but believe me one is quite enough and yes okay I guess one husband is more than enough.